"What is your life? You are a mist that
appears for a little while and then vanishes."
Now I know that time doesn't change, but these days it feels like it flies by a whole lot faster than it did when I was a child or in my youth. Waiting for things seemed to take forever then, and I must have wished away years, trying to speed things along.
I remember as a 21, almost 22-year-old, despairing of ever finding a mate, and fearing I would wind up an old maid. Those were the days of young love, and crushes, and a broken heart, as I gravitated towards men who were unavailable, or unable/unwilling to return my affections. But, as you can see, I did not stay an old maid forever. and here I am, a grandma, with a granddaughter about the age I was then, who undoubtedly has entertained similar thoughts--I think.
What I didn't realize is that every season has a blessing to be enjoyed, even though it may not be the one we are looking for. There are little windows of opportunity, easily missed, and no longer available down the road, like the free time I have available to do some of the things I enjoy when work is slow. I am self-employed, and tend to forget that my work is cyclical--feast or famine--and until the aha moment, when I realized the predictable pattern of it all, many wonderful breathing spells were wasted while I worried about how the bills would get paid.
There have been events in my life that I would have preferred not to have lived through, and yet, in retrospect, I see how closed doors led to better ones opening, that would not have opened had the original ones not closed. Which makes me think we are like tapestries being woven by a master weaver. It's hard, if not impossible, to see the emerging masterpiece when you are all caught up in the knots and tangles of the reverse side. It's only in looking back that you can appreciate it. Or at least, that has been my experience.